Is online international dating suitable for everyone?
Some people are skeptical about international dating without any serious reason. There are many myths around such a way of finding the love of your life. Let’s review whether such myths are worth taking into consideration and why they must be ignored.
The central myths of why international dating is not good
Myth 1. I am too old (ugly, stupid, fat) to participate in international online dating.
Tastes differ, you know. Probably, for some people, you might look like the words mentioned above, while others will completely accept you and adore you. Every person in the world has his or her own opinion. Do not rely on the view of your haters even if it helps sometimes. Try to consider the viewpoint of people who love you and who are your friends.
Moreover, even if you feel like not being worthy when dating in your native country, perhaps, the situation might be significantly different if it comes to international dating. For instance, if you are from Ukraine and you are a bit overweight, it does not mean you are ugly. There are many representatives from African countries who like when a woman is curvy. Seriously, not all men in the entire world prefer supermodels. To add more, there are even oversize models who are becoming more popular and famous. You should not worry about how you look outside. Focus on your traits of character, and keep on improving your personality.
Myth 2. People from different countries are losers that cannot find their love in their native countries.
First of all, it is not always like that. Sometimes such people are even too smart or too demanding to the representatives of the opposite sex in their native countries. They are not losers at all. Sometimes they are very successful people who want to find the ideal candidate to marry. To add more, some foreigners are sexually attracted only to girls or boys from another country. You should not judge it like this and be too strict with people from abroad.
Secondly, sometimes people want to find someone of the same level of IQ or income, which is hard to do in their original country. For instance, many beautiful and educated girls from India find their Mr. Right on international dating websites. Americans like Indian ladies and propose to them often. It does not mean that both partners are losers because they could hardly find their dream love in their native country.
Myth 3. People on dating websites are too desperate.
Can you call a person who wants to be happy a desperate one? On the one hand, he or she is excited about marrying a foreigner. On the other hand, they might like challenges and do not prefer if everything is smooth. People on international dating websites are not desperate at all. In most cases, they are trendy in their native country, but they want more. Such people like hurdles and getting over the issues. They are not looking for easy ways. Probably, this is your chance to find the most determined person ever on dating websites. Change your mind about such people if you still think they are the third sort. Try to respect the desire of foreigners to find the exact match according to their tastes. If he or she is your type, why not date this foreigner if they offer to go out?
Therefore, it would be better to say that foreigners are not desperate but more motivated. They know exactly what they want and are looking for their Mr. Right or charming lady with all the passion they have.
Myth 4. It is risky to date a foreigner.
No risk, no champagne, you know. Some people might think that it is dangerous to date a guy or woman from another country. Many people choose international dating sites to find the love of their lives frequently and efficiently. The truth is somewhere in the middle. International dating is no more dangerous type of dating if compared to dating people from your native country. For some people, such dating might be successful while it will not work for others. The success of dating, both a foreigner and a person from your native country, depends on various and hard-to-count reasons.
However, international dating is not worse than dating a person from your country. International dating gives you a chance to meet someone who has an alternative way of thinking and whose opinion is different from yours. If you want to become more mature and flexible, you would rather consider international dating than the regular one.
Myth 5. People usually lie on dating websites.
Dating a person from your native country, you are not guaranteed that he or she will remain honest and sincere with you about all. You should consider that some people tend to lie more often than others. You will have to develop a kind of filter in your mind and test your partner. If he or she passes the lie test, you should decide whether to continue dating them. If they fail, well, would you like to move on with a liar?
Telling lies is a feature of a person and a conscious decision. People lie because they are afraid not to be accepted as they are. On the first date, it is recommended for you to create such an atmosphere of communication where your partner will open up. When people lie, they forget it fast. If you want to test whether your friend lies to you, you might ask him or her the same question in different forms. For instance, you might ask, «Were you married?» at the beginning of a date and «Have you ever had a wife?» at the final stage of the date. The psychologists recommend such a method to figure out the truth at the very beginning of relationships.
Myth 6. Many people are not serious there.
No doubt, many dating sites’ users are not willing to build strong and serious relationships. The overwhelming majority of international dating sites’ users are conscious and determined. They do want to find the love of their lives and do everything possible to reach this goal.
Of course,a small percentage of people who hang out on dating sites are pick uppers and want just to hook a girl to spend a night with for one time. However, the truth is that most of the users are not like this. Maybe, you might come across the pick uppers, but soon you will find the serious partners.
Myth 7. A woman just wants to get a green card from you.
It is not a secret that some ladies use dating sites to find someone to register a marriage with them and relocate to another country. However, it happens rarely. Most girls want to find love for the rest of their lives. They are serious and have good intentions. Statistics claim that international marriages are much stronger than ordinary marriages. Your woman or man will not divorce you and find someone else because they are dreaming of marrying a foreigner if they are worthy partners.
You should learn how to differentiate the ladies who just want to take advantage of you from potential wives. For instance, you might ask her about her expectations from you and what she wants. If she says that she is penniless, you know, and needs money, you would rather be alert about it. Unfortunately, some women are very materialistic, but not all women on international dating sites are like them.
Myth 8. The prettiest and smartest women get married first.
Marriage is not a competition. You should not compete here to get the highest scores. Some men and women find their matches faster, while others need to spend more time on it. It depends on the fact that some people have a checklist that is much longer than others’ expectations. For instance, a woman might want her future husband to be attractive, intelligent, sexy, healthy, and 50 points more while the other one is looking only for a sexy and wealthy person — many men, many minds, to sum up.
Therefore, it is difficult and not right to conclude that the most stunning and savvy girls get married initially. The women might be compared to apples on a tree: some of them are hanging too close to the ground while the others stay on top, and it is hard to get them.
So think a little bit about it. Maybe your list of expectations is too long, and you should get more flexible. Or possibly, you would rather be more selective when choosing the ideal partner to have a happy marriage on a firm and steady foundation.
Myth 9. If you do not click on the first date, you are not meant for each other, and it will not work later on.
There are many examples when a man and woman could not find the common language on the first date. When they met later, they managed to understand each other. It might be explained as a result of the fact that sometimes two people are from different worlds. They might talk in different languages and have some principles.
However, if you spend more time with a potential partner, some of the hurdles on the way to communicate well just disappear. Especially, it might be like this when there is chemistry between you. So it is difficult to judge whether your partner is a worthy one after the first date. It is recommended to meet up for a second and even third time to get to know each other more.
There is no need to make fast decisions if it comes to building serious relationships. Just observe, notice, and make conclusions. Men and women are different from nature. It might take time for you to get to know each other well.
Myth 10. Love conquers all.
Sometimes people who date think that if they love each other, love will conquer everything that might appear on your way. However, it is not like that. Often, a couple should discuss the details about their further life before they even get involved into a relationship. Two people have to agree before they start going a certain road.
Love is essential but it is not everything you should have. Clear mind and rationality are two more things for you both to consider before moving on with your relationships. Do not worry if there is some misunderstanding at the initial step of relationships but try to discuss every single detail that you argue about.
Is it possible to find the love of your life when dating internationally?
The answer is «Yes». There are many examples of couples that coped to create a family as a result of international dating. Sometimes you should be patient and wait for the right person to come into your life. Sometimes you will need to be persistent and push your potential partner to date with you if he or she doubts. It is a matter of being initiative. If you initiate friendship, it will pay off, especially for men. For a male representative, it is essential to be a leader, and for a female it is essential to be sweet and friendly. If a man manages to make a woman trust him on the first date, it is good for him because your further relationships seem to be based on a firm and steady foundation.